Why do I constantly find me becoming the worst version of myself? I always would get angry at those who would drink/smoke etc, and now that I myself have gone through some rough points with friends and family and my past boyfriend, I have been indulging in the same sorts of things. The night I came home from breaking up, I went straight to the basement and grabbed a budwieser! There I was, just drinking away in bed feeling sorry for myself. Man, I know so many people who are actually going through tough times, and here I am being upset because I've had to chalk up another breaking of my heart on the list. Then I starting smoking cigars (a guilty pleasure of mine) and I see myself coming home and running into my room and changing so that my parents would be able to "smell" whats going on. I'm sure they wouldn't even care that much that I was smoking cigars, but I just don't want them to think I am going down some slippery slope. Even though I feel like I am. My weekdays are getting sucked up by school and stress, so on the weekends I cannot wait to go out with some friends and have some shots. I just need someone to give me a swift kick in the pants, so if anyone has some hard words of advice, PLEASE throw it my way!